Thursday, January 17, 2013

There growing up to fast

It's amazing how much time flies when you have kids. They grow up to fast. I swear I was just bringing my firstborn home from the hospital. I think Bryan and I hit the jackpot with our kids. There  just awesome kids. And I only know they are going to get even better with tine. I'm one proud mama, These were taken a year ago.


Disneyland is healing for the soul. I love Disneyland. I often wish I lived in Cal so I could get a year family pass, I totally would you know, I had the opportunity to go 2 times last year. First in March after Rykers funeral with Brooke to get away. That was such a great distraction, and a time to be able to laugh again. Brooke and I made a lot of memories on that trip. and it really helped me to just disappear for a week.

Next time we came with the whole family in October. That was also very fun. It was a different visit this time with the family cause the kids were all old enough to really enjoy it , We stayed a week. Took the kids out of school, don't report me please. :) and just had a good time. I"m telling you I still get gitty as a child when I go to that place. I love that we have the means and opportunities to go. And that my kids are always asking to go on any vacation. Man, if Walt Disney was alive to see the love people have for this place ad his imagination........ I need to go soon I just decided> :)


Hope. Its a small simple word, but its a word that holds great meaning. Ive been thinking about the word hope this week . I may in a minute may sound way to deep, or at least acting deep. More likely making no sense at all actually. But still impressed that I should blog about the word. So, bare with me.
Hope can be so uplifting and positive, or discouraging and negative.  Hope first came in the form of me wishing and longing to have a 4th baby. Snap ...pregnant.  Hope of a happy gender reveal Ultrasound turning negative and announcing problems. Hope of everything was going to turn out . Hope that some things were looking good and through a amino ruling out some other very real problems. Hope that I could survive the unknown. Hope that when I went to the hospital to deliver that I would be getting my epidural sooner then later. Hope that after Ryker was born and showing a few positive signs of not needing to much  medical help as originally thought and having things only progress. Hope that after I was settled in my room I could try to get a few hours of sleep. Hope that when I heard that phone ring in my room that it was not bad news on the other line. Hope that the ECMO machine he was going to go on was going to be brief and would make everything all better. Hope that all those numbers on the monitor of his vitals would be stable. I spent hours and hours there just staring at that monitor. Hope he would get off ECMO soon. Hope of getting word he was making huge strides forward . But just as much as the positive came and you were feeling a tad calmer BOOM some new emergency set back occurred. Seriously that was a roller coaster ride I do not recommend to anyone. Hope that hell make it through another surgery. Hope that he will be able to survive with out the ECMO. Hope that all would be stable. Hope that Rykers siblings could meet him soon. Hope that all that breast pumping would be worth it. Hope that I was not burdening  all those angels taking care of meals for months for my family. Hope I could finally hold him close. Hope that because he actually did well being held that I would be able to do it a lot more times. Hope that I could dress him. Hope that the outfit I bought and he only wore one full day would fit. Hope that they had Dr Pepper and eclairs in the cafeteria . Hope I was not looking to homely. Hope all the prayers were being heard.  Hope that Our favorite nurses were on call working with him all day and night. Hope that my favorite comic relief ellens  daytime show was recording at  home and I could watch it each night. Hope that we would not get any late night phone calls of bad news. Hope all the specialists didn't know what they were talking about when they told us he was not going to survive. Hope that we made the right desicion in letting him go. Hope that it would be fast and painless for him. Hope I would not become a basket case. Hope we explained it well to our children, Hope we took all the right pictures. Hope we made the right decision in his funeral, Hope I could get out of bed each day. Hope that he would not be forgotten. Fact that families are together forever. Fact that I will see him again. Fact he is near. Fact that I"m stronger now then I ever been. Fact that he was loved by many. Fact that he was a missionary in his own way. Fact he lived a beautiful like. Hope that he felt our love as much as we felt his. Hope that this coming Year will be way better then last year. Hope I never have to go through that ever again of seeing only brighter things in our future.

And hope that all those who helped and supported our family for months. Know how much we appreciated it all and we love them so much. Thanks from the bottom of my heart.

What does the word hope mean to you and how do you have hope in your lives. Like I said...powerful word

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

We're back!!!

Oh man its been to long. I decided since Santa ,who is very handsome by the way, got me a new windows 8 tablet/laptop for Christmas I would start up the old blog again. Did you all miss me? Anyway, hello again, to all my old friends and new.

We Definetly have been through a lot since my last entry. We moved. Got all kids in full time school. Bryan's business growing by leaps and bounds, and lastly, most important, but not the happiest we added to our family. Ryker Reece was born Jan 4 2011 , but we lost him in April of the same year. Ryker was the most strongest fighting baby you ever met. He was born with a lot of odds against him, and although the outcome was not desired he still defied many odds. Without going into all the details (since most of you know his story anyway) he passed because of a diaphragmatic hernia, and multiple holes in his heart. We love and miss him everyday. But Heaven feels a little closer now in our home.

The kids are growing by leaps and bounds. Brookelyn is 11 but will be 12 in March. That thought just about kills me! Me having a 12 yr old. Yikes! She is still as sweet as she can be. She has many friends and is also just a friend to all. She loves art and is very creative. She is growing up to a fine young lady. Vincent is 9. Bryan and I are sure he is probly going to grow up to be a lawyer cause he will argue with you about anything. He is also such a clown. He is a sensitive boy. He to has a lot of friends. Exspecially a core group in our neighborhood wich he calls "the crew". Brenin is 6. He is in the first grade and is so smart, He really is a fast learner. He is so sweet and so diplomatic. He is always the first one to offer you a snuggle. Bryan is enjoying success with and other projects. He has hired employees now and is really still loving his work. He has a office space in Pleasant Grove about 5 minutes away and it has all been such a blessing. Im doing well. I continue to have my good moments and bad moments but we have such a hudge support system that im always being lifted up. Im still a busy mom but enjoying my "alone" time during the day and hoping to get into some projects that are constantly on my mind. I really cannot even begin to complain about this awesome life im living. Its a constant learning expierence everyday but I probly wouldn't change it for the world. The good, bad and the ugly!

I hope I can be regular on my blog posting. My hopes are to at least try to do it at least 1 a week but im not going to bet on that just yet. But then again, it is almost a new year...and anything is possible. :) Till next time!

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Holiday Fun

Ok, this is to much fun! Enjoy and Merry Christmas from The Livingstons!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Saturday, November 7, 2009

School Pictures

Here are Brookelyn and Vincent's new school pictures. I know im partial...but OH MY! Super cute!! They look so big! I love how blue Vincent's eyes look. And, Brooke...I cannot believe that is my daughter! so proud of them.

Brookelyn-3rd grade
Vincent- 1st grade